Extormity service and support is available on an hourly fee basis, with a minimum initial commitment of 225 hours at an hourly rate generated by a confusing algorithm.

Please have your credit card information available, and call us for service and support (regular long distance rates apply, average on-hold time roughly 97 minutes). You will be connected to the Extormity Call Center, where a lengthy and bewildering series of automated voice commands will prompt the entry of financial information. After credit approval, your call will be forwarded to our operations command center located in a bunker on a remote island. In the event that actual contact cannot be made online, we’re told a supply ship is able to deliver messages to them at least every two months.